A year ago the hubs and I spent a weekend away. Surrounded by decoration and festivities, I found my heart tender to the stories around me. When I came back, I wrote about it, simply to encourage anyone who finds hurt in this season.
Now, as December begins again, I find myself back there, humbled, hopeful and needing to share.
December songs tell us it's to be the warm and cozy month. The one where we are satisfied, full and overflowing.
And, yes, there are seasons of life where this is true. Where the magic is felt and seen and believed.
But then, there are other seasons of life.
Then there was Joseph, pining for his love, counting down the days to finally be with her, to care for her, to be hers and only hers, to build their family, to build their dreams.
The first Christmas was, in fact, everything of these dreams lost.
This was the way Christmas began.
Some years they are small ways, trivial in comparison, but can't we all relate? Loss in the gift that just didn't get celebrated the way we planned. An unexpected work shift. The invitation we didn't receive.The delayed flight. A burned-black dinner. Exhaustion from the year.
And yet, many times, the hunger of dreams unfilled is so much more vicious. Tension at the table, years of what no one can speak. The job, financial provision suddenly gone. A relationship changed without explanation. The one we loved and lost before we even held them in our arms. Or after years of traditions and memories, someone's place missing, their plate unfilled, their voice unheard.
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